We Want YOU! Become a Bigot NOW!
This one will be a little slippery for sure… but yeah, you heard me right! Become a bigot now!! Show your solidarity! Show your pride! Let the world know… that you are above reproach! Get your swagger on with puffed up trumpeters sounding out to make way for the king… queen… prince… princess of “I’m better than you because!”
I was raised in a prejudice household… being taught the “N” word before I could form sentences. Getting my mother into hot water in the grocery stores pointing at every black person I saw and calling them the only name I knew. Isn’t that cute?
In the same breath, I was taught not to let anyone judge me or look down on me. I’m ½ Italian (the only ½ that matters, so I’ve been told); the most superior of all the European cultures. It was my job to show everyone how much better I was than them. It was my duty.
As I grew into a young girl, I was taught that God and religion was for the weak. Religion was a way to “keep the working man down” to tow the line for those who were in power. Anyone who believes in God is weak and should be pitied for not having a backbone.
Funny enough, I grew in to quite the round little girl. No… let’s just call it out. I was fat… another thing to despise people for. Fat people are disgusting with no will power, no self control, no pride or dignity in themselves.
Instinctively I knew I was now lumped into the category of “worthless piece of shit” to be looked down on, just like all of the other people who weren’t in the superior category. My “tribe” was ashamed of me, and I was made to be ashamed of myself… starting at about 6 years old.
I no longer “belonged”… I didn’t belong in my family, I didn’t belong in school, I was teased and made fun of not only by my peers… but by adults too. Hey, it was all in good fun of course.
It was achingly apparent that every time I was told “Don’t let anyone look down on you.” I was being judged and hung… no trial.
The other thing that was deeply apparent… while I was being called names belittled and bullied about my weight in school… I had to fully embrace my bigoted foundation and rip the other person apart in turn. You call me a “fat pig”? I’ll call you something worse. And if my words don’t hurt you, I will physically fight you… then you’ll be sorry.
As I got older… the weight never came off… and if it did, it wouldn’t stay off for long. My inner drive of staying deeply rooted in the role of outcast, loser, reject was far too powerful to make me “normal” and “acceptable”.
Many days, weeks, months alone without friends… just with my feelings, I pondered the thought, “I don’t want anybody to ever feel the pain of rejections the way I have. I want to feel loved and accepted… I want to be appreciated. Maybe if I do that for and toward others… others will love and appreciate me in turn.”
I stopped seeing the ugliness I was trained to see in people and started seeing their loveliness…. I chose to be loving and kind when my “tribe” wasn’t looking. I was making friends that (through my “tribe”) I would be condemned to have. I was a closet lover of humanity, disguised at home as a hypocritical bigot.
Throughout my school years I would befriend all sorts of people… ranging from popular to outcasts, white to black, Atheist to Catholic to Jewish and everything in between. If you were kind to me in turn, you had a place in my life.
As I surrounded myself with kind people, I took the next step and dared to be… should I say it…….. Spiritual! (GASP!)
I was overjoyed!!! I’m finally going to be surrounded by people who are committed to personal improvement through spirituality! They would never judge or reject me! They will be too connected to the universal truths of love and kindness to do anything like that! EVER!
What I found is there are just as many “bigots” in the spiritual world as there are at home or in your community of choice.
My next thought was…. “REALLY?!”
It doesn’t show itself the same way it did in my family. It was much more insipid. The “Namaste” greetings and “blessings” are a cover up for many who judged me as not “spiritual” enough… not truly “connected”. The spiritual superiority reeked from some of these individuals…. Claiming that their practice was the most evolved... their connections were the deepest… their teachings were beyond all others. VOMIT!
I’ve met blacks who hate whites (and vice-verse). I’ve met Christians who hate sinners (check it out… Jesus befriended the sinner). I’ve met Democrats who hate Republicans (and vices-verse). Wealthy who have nothing but disdain the poor (and vice-verse). Need I go on?
After years of soul searching and personal improvement… I’ve come to realize that bigotry shows itself in many forms and in every group… be it racial, religious, political, etc… so why not just embrace your intolerance? Call it what it is. It’s bigotry… plain and simple.
Or, you can just take a moment… step back… love yourself enough to see that everyone has their path to walk and hatred and intolerance are just a perpetual “tale chase” in the attempt to pump one’s self up.
Whatever you choose… own it and call it what it is. It’s your choice.
If you've gotten this far... I Thank you for taking this journey with me and encourage you to share the slippery rocks that come cause you to stumble and fumble... we can do our best to support each other on this walk.
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Warning to Readers: My ponderings, opinion and druthers are subject to change… without notice… not even to me! The only consistency you’ll find here is striving for sure footedness and looking for the silver linings in life.
Bio: Lucia Steele is a Vision Keeper + Muse + Writer + Editor + Vision Strategist. She’s crazy in love with her kids! For eight years she hosted the daily radio show Contact Talk Radio with her wonderfully amazing husband Cameron Steele. They turned that fun and informative show into a 24/7 radio station and has owned & operated www.CTRNetwork.com since 2006.
Lucia is on a journey of self discovery… That's all. Ask her anything you want and she'll share as much as she feels comfortable to share.