February 14, 2012, Valentines Day

So appropriate.  Even those among us ruminating harsh memories of love can feel a sense of possibility on Valentines Day–that belief that new love is possible.  Today’s guests experienced transformation from an old and popular way of thinking–”love just happens”–to actually creating the love they wanted.  How?

Let’s start with Mali Apple and Joe Dunn.  They are a thriving couple from southern California who wrote The Soulmate Experience.  Mali opened with an unconventional idea, “You must accept your partner exactly as he or she is.”  How often do we find ourselves nagging our loved ones toward change?  Even when feeling burned by this system, we might resort to praying for change.  Yet the message is that we are unhappy and have abandoned all “acceptance” of our partners.

Mali’s husband, Joe Dunn, asserts the notion that “we must invite our partners to join in any experience,” even if they choose to decline, as an invitation moves towards the heart.  We know from experience that our expectations take us out of a heartfelt connection and toward isolation.

The couple feels it is so important to identify core beliefs that they opening chapter of their book, they state, “Your belief create your experience.”  Naturally, if we manifest that we “are not good enough,” such a partner will find his or her way into our realm and help us heal that belief.  But it might not be the sort of “help” we bargained for, and for this reason, it is important to note that “we decide what we believe.”  It is a conscious choice.  Mali and Joe shined vibrantly as they shared their own happiness, experience, and relief from choosing each other from a positive belief base.

Todd Alan reminded the listeners that we must be open to change, which is a great segue to Gina Hardy’s work, “Conscious Union, because she asserts that her audience should return at a later date if they are not open, now, to change.  Sounds like tough love, but her design will lead the intentional clients to real love if they dare to commit to change.

Joined her partner, Joel Young, Gina spoke eloquently about her love experiences and a found “authenticity” in her current relationship.  “Authenticity is our birthright.  It knocks on {your] door from deep below” as a reminder that we’re out of alignment.  To be awake with our partners, we have to be awake with ourselves.  Gina says for any successful partnering, the number one “must have” lies in both parties availability to at their own issues.  Joel firmly agreed as she concluded, “if just one party stays stick, the relationship can become erosive.”

Perhaps the most entertaining aspect of today’s show occurred between Todd Alan and Joel Young as they digressed to the topic of “ordinary blokes” who must step us to “we” thinking.  It is not just the needs of each individual, but the realization that a third entity–the partnership–requires a low-pressure tending to by both parties.

While all these ideas sound blissfully simple, may I suggest holding them right there–in a simple space–and just seeing how joyful your Valentines Day can be solely by showing up with your beloved and offering your authentic self.  May love and peace be yours.

Debby Handrich

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